Photo Courtesy of TrojanWire.com

For serious?

I used to think that athletes who tested positive for performance enhancing drugs tainted their respective sports, but now I find myself enamored by it all.

For what reason you ask?

Is there anything better than the excuses that come out of the mouths of these guys? I mean honestly. Brian Cushing, last years Defensive Rookie of the Year, blames his positive test on the fact that he “overtrained.”  I’m not nearly clever enough to come up with this stuff.

via ESPN.com

Suspended Houston Texans linebacker Brian Cushing said Monday that his positive test for a fertility drug last year was the result of overtrained athlete syndrome, a “unique” condition he contends can trigger hormonal spikes.

It’s true, Brian Cushing, a man who was linked with steroids during his playing days at USC, has the only known case of “overtrained athlete syndrome” in the NFL.

Do the Houston Texans not have a publicist? Do they not proofread these statements before letting their athletes read them?

If anyone, you know, like Texans owner Bob McNair, actually believes this shit, then I’ve given up on the human population. Cancel everything, lets fast forward to 2012 and start over from scratch.

Oh, and for all you “regular” medical doctors out there, The Cush has something for you.

I had a unique situation where something like this occurred and we have the science to back it up. It’s taken months. It’s really beyond what we ever thought and it’s beyond the regular medical doctor.

I give up.

I’d say that’s iconic, wouldn’t you?

Derek Jeter surpassed Babe Ruth tonight on the Major League Baseball all time hits list with a second inning single versus the Boston Red Sox.  In typical Jeter fashion, the long time Yankee captain hit a grounder through the infield to score Brett Gardner.

As an outsider, I have nothing but respect for Jeter, who, as the leader of the New York Yankees, Major League Baseball’s “evil empire”, garners a lot of unwarranted hate.

With that hit in the second inning, Jeter now stands alone in 39th place on the all time hits list, surpassing arguably the greatest Yankee of all time, as well one of the more paramount figures in not just baseball, but sports history.

Hats off to #2

Today’s popular blog post details Jen Sterger’s text message exchanges with Brett Favre in which the legendary gunslinger sent her a couple of “dick pix” through MMS. Hmm, guess an exchange would mean she sent something back, right? Let’s say that Sterger was on the receiving end of some unexpected picture mail. Just when you thought the media’s infatuation with everything Brett Favre could not get more exhausted, saddle in (or up?) because this could take a while.

Personally, I think that Sterger should gift wrap some sort of fruit basket and send it Daulerio’s way. Her 15 minutes of fame were up two years ago, this is just another way to bring her back into the spotlight, something I’m sure she’s desperately wanting.

While Daulerio did report yesterday that an unnamed source did not want to go public with this story, he did send Sterger and e-mail warning her shit was about to go down.

I’m very close to running your Favre allegations today. I’ve spoken to the Jets about this. So let me know how you want to proceed, please. I’d prefer you were on the record about this stuff, but I understand if you don’t want to be. However, I do have our email conversations we had and, frankly, that’s enough to get this started.

Not trying to dick you over, but, there was no way I was going to sit on it forever, either.

So lemme know.

What I would give to have Jen Sterger’s e-mail address. Christ.

‘Brett Favre Once Sent Me Cock Shots’: Not A Love Story – (Deadspin)

Given the current situation with the Phillies, I found this pretty humorous.

ESPN’s Buster Olney and Jayson Stark are reporting the Phillies are in trade talks that would see them parting with All Star rightfielder Jayson Werth while bringing in a veteran starting pitcher. The likely suspects?  Ben Sheets, Oakland ( 4-9 4.53 ERA) , Dan Haren, Arizona (7-8 4.60 ERA), Jeremy Guthrie, Baltimore (3-10 4.58 ERA), and the most appealing name being thrown out there, Houston Astros’ righthanded pitcher Roy Oswalt (6-11 3.12 ERA) .

Both Olney and Stark are also reporting that if the Phillies were to acquire Oswalt, they would need a third team in the deal, currently the Tampa Bays, as an unloading destination for Jayson Werth.

In recent weeks, fans have turned their back on Werth. The man behind the beard has been a fan favorite since his arrival, however, a horrendous slump in the last month accompanied with altercations with fans and a poor attitude in the clubhouse has made this once great love affair take a detour towards divorce court. A phenomenal player when he catches fire, Werth’s time in Phillies pinstripes may be drawing to an end, much sooner than anyone would have liked.

For Phils’ fans, this season could have gone any worse to this point. The injury bug has hit the Phillies pretty hard, as starters Jimmy Rollins, Chase Utley, Placido Polanco, Carlos Ruiz, J.A. Happ, closer Brad Lidge, and after last nights loss to the Cardinals, starter Jamie Moyer is also on the DL. have all spent significant amounts of time on the disabled list.  After the acquisition of Roy Halladay in the off-season, the Phillies were the popular pick to win the National League Pennant, but as of right now, they are 48-45 and stand 7 games back of the first place Atlanta Braves with 69 games left to play.

For Phils’ fans, it’s very hard to be optimistic at this time, I know, but just remember the good ole 7 in 17 comeback in 2007, that might instill a little bit of hope, right? Right.

Sigh.

To avoid beating the “Jayson Werth Public Persona” horse anymore than it already has been, I’ll provide some links here that have done so very well of late. Enjoy, or if you’re a Phillies fan, start contemplating what life after Werth is going to be like.

Is Werth Wearing Thin? – (Crossing Broad)

A Note on Werth – ( The Morning Call )

The Werth Hate Fest Continues ( Crashburn Alley)

Jayson Werth: A Poor Man’s Bobby Abreu ( iSportacus )

The Jayson Werth Love Affair Cools ( the 700 level)

There was also this tiff that he had with a fan close to two weeks ago on a foul ball that Werth probably would have had a play on if a father and his son weren’t in Werth’s space.

Jumping off of the Werth bandwagon seems to be the popular trend these days, but that’s how it goes in Philadelphia I suppose. Jimmy Rollins took a bunch of heat for his “frontrunner” and “bandwagon” claims, but sadly enough, it appears that he’s right about them. Phillies fans are a pessimistic bunch. I’ll admit my worries about this team are at a season high right now, but there’s plenty of ball left in the summer.

The Phillies are a team scratching for answers and if they are to right this ship, Werth is going to be a integral part in guiding it northward.

For now, enjoy the simple minded Phillies fans who think Werth “sucks” or whatever clever adjective they can come up with to describe his recent slump. Monitor those fans closely, for they will be driving that wagon when Werth goes on one of those epic tears that will remind us of how special a talent he really is.

I see what you did there, Petey, with your double entendre.

Either way, there’s no doubt in my mind that if Gammons was still at ESPN, he’d have to get the OK from the higher ups on some of his tweets. Can’t say I don’t enjoy them, however. His not so subtle slap in the face of Stu Scott a month back was a good one, and it’s also fun to enjoy his off topic rants. MLB Network seems to be a lot more lenient with its talent than ESPN will ever be. Gammons is a baseball writer, if he was still at ESPN, his off topic tweets that he publishes every once in a while probably wouldn’t fly with the the big dogs in Bristol, but he’s not, so he can, and we all, for better or for worse, get to see how bat shit crazy he really is.

Jayson Werth No Longer a Fan Favorite – ( Crossing Broad )

The 18th Annual ESPY Awards are on tonight, that’s kinda worth watching I suppose. Oh? Seth Meyers from the incredibly mediocre Saturday Night Live is hosting? What’s that? Using the adjective “mediocre” is giving that piece of shit show too much credit? I’m sorry, seriously, very sorry.

Baseballs second half resumes tomorrow and for the next month that’s all we, as sports fans, will have to keep us going. The NFL and College Football are just around the bend, as well as HBO’s AWESOME series “Hardknocks” comes back at the end of the August.

So enjoy your lack of sports tonight. Perhaps make your way to MTV to watch the Real World New Orleans Part Deux? No? Nothing? Didn’t think so. I recommend taking about five tylenol PM’s and just calling it a night right now.

Seth Meyers, I hate you.